Here are a few anecdotes to make you smile:)
1. Oh, my God! –utters wife. -I am sick and tired of our never-ending scandals! Husband: -Well, would you rather have me beat you up in silence?
2. Hey, listen, dude! I just got myself a new phone with a really awesome calling plan! -Oh really?! Which one is it? -Well, I pay nothing for incoming and outgoing calls -But there has to be something wrong with it then -Nope, nothing is wrong with it! -Perhaps the phone is too bulky?! -No, actually I’ve got the latest sleek model -Perhaps the roaming is expensive?! -No, no, I can call from anywhere to anywhere…for free! Write down my phone number: 1531479165916589771985798746891789719873871617856178657689. Did you get it down? -Yep! -Well, this is just the area code; here is the number...
3. Some Company X has a very strict working schedule: 9 AM - 6 PM. Everyone however is working from 7 AM to 8 PM due to an overwhelming amount of work. Suddenly, everyone began noticing one man who would come to work at 9 AM and leave around 6 PM day after day...in the course of the entire week. Then, one of his coworkers got completely annoyed with such behavior: -Hey, are you completely nuts or something? We are all working here like slaves and you think you can just slack off and do nothing? Completely stunned, the guy replies: -Well, you see, I am on vacation!
4. Father returns home from a long day at work and finds his daughter having fun with a vibrator. Father: -Hey, dear, what are you doing? Daughter: -Well dad, you see, it is so hard to find a decent guy these days! They are all bastards! I stopped by a sex shop today and decided to buy myself a "husband”...Now, I no longer need a man! The next day, the girl comes home and witnesses the following scene: Her father sits at the table and drinks vodka. On the opposite side of the table lies her vibrator with a glass of vodka next to it. Daughter: -Dad, what are you doing? -I though I would have a few shots with my son in law!
5. How cool would the advertising campaign be if the well-known slogans were used to advertise...Condoms!!!
Condoms "Nokia" - "Connecting people!" Condoms "PEUGEOT" - "Games are over!" Condoms "Blend-A-Med" - "Triple protection for the entire family!" Condoms "McDonald's" - "I'm lovin' it" Condoms "L'Oreal" - "Because you're worth it" Condoms "Nike" - "Just Do It"
Putin's official spokesman Dmitry Peskov commented on remarks in the US media about failures in launching nuclear-capable missiles in Russia
The Buk system that shot down MH17 belonged to the 53rd SAM missile brigade of the Russian Ministry of Defense, investigators say after looking at a few pictures on the net
It has long been understood that the West has been trying to subject Russian borders to total control. We have not seen such activity even during the Cold War