A little bit of flirting at work, pillow talk, sudden courtesies – what is there behind all those things? Does a man harbor serious feelings to you, or does he do that for his own advantage? Psychologist Ivan Fenin, Candidate of Biological Sciences, believes that such riddles are quite easy to read.
Observation: He starts acting like a little boy.
Conclusion: He doesn’t care what I may think about him.
As a matter of fact, this kind of behavior with men indicates that he likes you. As a rule, men feel like fish out of water when it comes to feelings. That is why adult men return to that period of their life when feelings were much closer to them – their childhood. Reflexively, they start acting like little boys. Incommunicative men would smile and giggle, whereas intellectual men would start saying stupid things of no importance. It is an open secret that boys usually fight with girls whom they like a lot – they call their names, find faults with them on every possible occasion, etc. They try to hide their true feelings, which is so typical of all men. Adult men may have this very type of behavior with adult women too: a man may like a woman, but he feels that he must disguise his feelings.
Observation: He remembers nothing of what I told him, or what he told me.
Conclusions: He is not interested in me.
As a matter of fact, it does not add up to much. A woman needs to bear in mind the fact that unlike women, men do not lay too much emphasis on words. As a rule, men forget what they tell their women in a fit of passion, whereas women prefer to analyze every word and every phrase that they hear from their men.
Observation: He avoids touching me.
Conclusion: He tries to avoid me.
As a matter of fact, it may be true. However, if a man also displays his affection in some other way, he is most likely afraid of taking liberties with a woman, that is why he tries to avoid a physical contact with a woman.
Observation: He forgot that he had hurt me.
Conclusion: He does not love me.
As a matter of fact, it is a wrong conclusion to make. As a rule, men do their best not to remember offences, because they can make men vulnerable, which contradicts to man’s nature. Quite on the contrary, women get hung up on unpleasant memories, because they are emotionally stronger for it. That is why, women can hurt men with their angry words a lot, even if they apologize.
Observation: He does not like it when I say something good about other men.
Conclusion: He is jealous, which means that he loves me.
As a matter of fact, it may not be true for all occasions. It all depends on what kind of person the man is. There are bigheaded men, who are certain that it is only them who can provoke women’s interest, and they dislike any distraction of this interest. In addition, they may have purely career ambitions at that.
Observation: He does not understand that I am flirting with him just because I’m bored.
Conclusion: I need to explain it to him, and everything will be left as it was.
As a matter of fact, do not even think about it. A woman may indeed flirt with a man for no particular reason. A man usually perceives such tokens of attention very seriously. A man always knows what he wants. It is the result, not the process that is important for him. Most likely, a man will try to develop such a relationship further on. If a woman has no serious feelings, her refusal will become a humiliation to a man. Men do not tolerate it when women bait them on their male vanity.
Observation: He knows how to court a woman, and he fulfils all my demands.
Conclusion: He is serious about his feelings towards me.
As a matter of fact, it is not necessarily so. Men usually behave so if they want to achieve a certain goal. True feelings are usually characterized with mistakes and inconsistency. True feelings trigger spontaneous actions and decisions, whereas proper courtship is usually based on cold-blooded premeditation.
Observation: He does not like talking to me about his health, nor does he complain of misfortunes in his life.
Conclusion: He doesn’t trust me.
As a matter of fact, you are most likely wrong to think so. It is the male interest, which does not let him look week and miserable in your eyes. In addition, most men do not know how to describe their feelings, no matter what kind of feelings they may have. Boys don’t cry so to speak.
Observation: He sometimes fights with me and can be rude with me, although he is not like that with other people.
Conclusion: I make him mad all the time.
As a matter of fact, this is an absolutely wrong assumption. His intemperance of expression shows that something offended his sensibilities just because of the fact that he is not indifferent to you. His vehement language does not mean that he is about to break up with you. Quite on the contrary, it shows that he stepped over the psychological barrier, which always exists between two strangers, that he wholly trusts you, once he is not afraid to demonstrate this side of his to you. Zigmund Freud believed that any kind of male aggression towards a woman is based on sexual reasons.
Observation: He can hardly take his eyes off me, even if we are in a company.
Conclusion: He likes me.
As a matter of fact, you are right. If he stares at you, it is a serious challenge, most likely erotic. However, there are other more expressive, purely biological indications of such interest: he strokes his neck when talking to you or is standing astride grasping the buckle of his belt.
Observation: He is too quick in his decisive actions.
Conclusion: He doesn’t value me much.
As a matter of fact, men are usually quick in making decisions about a situation. It is enough for him to realize that a woman likes him, and he is ready to act out. It usually takes a much longer time for women’s feelings to develop, because women need to analyze themselves at that. Women think that second thoughts are best, they usually measure thrice and cut once. A wise man would never hurry a woman and tell her point blank “I like you.”