There are women who are unlucky in their love life. They are usually women at age 30 and over. One can divide them into several groups for convenience.
A woman who understands everything
She really understands all his problems that his wife never understands. She even accepts the fact that he cannot divorce his wife. This understanding can last for years. She understands that she should not ask unnecessary questions or cause problems to a man. That is to be always ready, for example, to take a day off work if he suddenly finds some time off his wife, children and work. Usually, he has a low-paid job, that is why his ever-understanding woman has to give him good trousers for his birthday, a jacket for his child or face powder for his wife.
She fully understands that he cannot go on holidays with her. She understands that he has to visit his terminally ill mother-in-law with his gravely ill wife and a child with psychological problems. She also has a proper understanding of his coming and going with a suitcase.
Some time later she decides to break up with him for good. But he turns up with a bouquet of mimosas and whispers a magic spell: “You understand everything, don’t you?” This phrase mesmerizes her and she keeps on understanding everything for many years of their hopeless relations. When her age enables her to understand him no longer, she is left alone without any understanding in her home.
A woman who does not want to get married at all
As a matter of fact, she does. But she keeps on repeating that she does not. For some reason that she cannot explain herself, this type of woman is certain that marriage is a form of legalised prostitution. In addition, she thinks that dropping a pair of men’s socks in a washing machine is backbreaking work for a woman. Is it for feminists?
She does not perceive striking differences, but she suspects that something is amiss. She feels rather lonely, especially at nights when the wind is blowing outdoors and maybe a pair of not very dirty socks is not so execrable. Nevertheless, she fights off these treacherous thoughts and any sign of her weakness. “Why do I need a man? I earn a living myself. Moreover, I can’t stand somebody walking back and forth before my eyes.” These are her typical thoughts.
There are quite a few motivations and reasons. She will pour them out to a rare man that enters her life. Men are not just fearful, but also submissive. If you don’t want it, I don’t want it either. This night she is again alone. Maybe, she falls to thinking how stupid of her it was. But in the morning she forgets about all her nightmares and over and over again she tells her admirer: “I am concerned with nothing but sex and business.” As you wish. “And I need complete freedom in our relations,” she adds self-consciously. Naturally, who would mind free relations? Again she suffers from insomnia; she needs someone, but nobody needs her.
But she is successful, she has a nice suit and she loves her job. Merely out of habit she doesn’t want to have any relations. However, men do not want to be in relations with her. They are frightened; they are accustomed to it. The best variant is a joint project, a casual encounter that ends with awesome sex.
A woman who does want to get married badly
This is an absolutely different type of woman. Such women are dying to become a wife, no matter whose wife. Her motives are incomprehensible. In fact, the number of reasons is so great, that it is still impossible to find out the major one: time goes by, all her friends are married, her mother tells her to get married, it is high time to give birth to a baby, she has no wedding pictures and so on. Any man within reach will be regarded as a potential husband. If a male colleague invited her for a cup of coffee, she imagines him already in a black suit. She sizes up a business partner, asks her new neighbour to buy some bread and invites him to drink tea and to have sex. In the morning she slips into a dressing gown, makes coffee and chats about something looking innocently into his horrified eyes. All is fair when you attempt to get married. Such a woman will make a perfect “non-understanding” wife. As a rule, her beloved will not meet her expectations, because he is a brute making little money. As a matter of fact, she should have married another man. She is likely to divorce him and launch a search of a new husband. The process is as mindless and merciless as her desire to get married.
A compassionate woman
This is a more dangerous type in comparison with women who understand everything. A guilt complex instilled since her early childhood will not let her have any relationship. She constantly takes pity on somebody – her mother, father, grandmother or grandfather. She buys diapers for her small nephews, treats her brother for alcoholism or performs her colleague’s work for nothing. A man can always get a plate of soup at her place and hear something like ”you poor thing”, “go and have a rest” or “I will do it myself”. But a man may soon be bored with that, as much as he can be bored with never-ending telephone talks with her friends who need moral support. She will always find someone to feel pity for. She does not need happiness in her love life. If she has no one to take pity on, she will pine away and may start keeping a dog. The poor pet is doomed.
Naturally, the above-mentioned types of women do not include all kinds of women who are unlucky in their personal life. We do not take into consideration mama’s darlings, unlucky wives and sluts. But any of these can change if they follow the help-yourself principle, because first of all, they are women and everything is in their hands.
Translated by Julia Bulygina