Author`s name Vasily Amirjanov

Lukashenko believes the West manipulates Belarus protesters from space

Hardly had the public wrap their minds around the news about the "interception" of the conversation between Berlin and Warsaw (the conversation was held between two people, who called themselves Nick and Mike), when the sitting president of Belarus announced the continuation of the exciting dialogue.

During his recent interview to loyal Russian media outlets, President of Belarus Alexander Lukashenko revealed a few details about the protests in the country.

According to Alexander Lukashenko, the release of new episodes starring Nick and Mike now depends on the director of the FSB (Federal Security Bureau) of Russia, Alexander Bortnikov, who has received the full version of the intercepted audio recording. Lukashenko added more fuel to the fire of the intrigue:

"I can tell you that this is nonsense (the first part of the" interception "- ed.). This is nothing really, you have no idea what information we have, and the worst is still to come!" he said.

Judging by Lukashenko's excitement, he really enjoyed the audio recording. Moreover, Lukashenko believes that the West manipulates protesters in Belarus from space.

"I get into a helicopter, but they, bastards, the Americans, are watching. They can see everything from space, so they sent a signal to their center near Warsaw that the presidential helicopter took off. As soon as the presidential helicopter took off, and that was literally, well, if directly, one and a half kilometers, they (the protesters Belarusians - ed.) started running. They began to disperse ... We descended in the helicopter and I was watching them moving away from the Palace of Independence."

The incumbent President of Belarus also explained to the Russian media that it was not OMON fighters (riot police) who were beating detained individuals in detention centers - it was employees of penitentiary institutions instead. Apparently, that makes some difference, but only to Lukashenko.

In the interview, Alexander Lukashenko authoritatively claimed that he knows everything about what is happening in his country, and he knows everything about the colour of young women's bums too.

"Now we see that some girls had their backsides painted blue. Did you see that? We can show you the videos," Lukashenko said.

According to Alexander Lukashenko, it turns out that all those who were mercilessly beaten up in detention centres in Belarus were repeatedly convicted prisoners, who attacked the police first.

"When they were drunk and stoned, and there were 60 percent of them, they rushed to attack those guys (detention center employees - ed.), the latter responded to them!"

Apparently, there are too many "drunken and stoned convicted prisoners" in Minsk - there are actually thousands of them, as one could see during the first days after the presidential election in Belarus.

It is a pity that they did not publicize the painting procedure that was conducted in relation to those women.
Creative competitors

The satirical online publication "Panorama" is sounding the alarm as it is becoming more and more difficult for it to compete in writing "spicy" news stories with  Alexander Lukashenk's PR specialists. Many serious media outlets often take headlines of the satirical publication seriously and spread them on the Internet as trustworthy news that people are supposed to believe. Here's just a few of them:

  • "The authorities of Belarus ban crab sticks";
  • "Russia and Belarus to build Brest-Kaliningrad highway bypassing Poland";
  • "Valentina Tereshkova asks Lukashenko to amend the Constitution of Belarus";
  • "Expelled Belarusian students to be replaced by Russian ones";